growing in saying no...

So i haven't share this yet, but i had the opportunity to go to haiti and i said no. The team in haiti that is there to relieve sherrie's teachers for a week... (spoke of in the previous post)... well kathy asked me if i wanted to be a part of that team. she asked me while both her and beaver where in haiti in the end of February. of course any chance i get to go to haiti i don't hesitate... i just say yes...because why in the world would i say no... that would not make sense. however kathy really asked me to pray about it and think about it before giving my default answer...which would always be yes.

it was hard to say ok, i will pray and process before giving an answer because i want to return VERY MUCH...it was also hard because i have never technically been on a trip with kathy, casey or really much ministries... i also havent ever been to Gonaives or worked with sherrie... therefore i felt wow here is my opportunity to expand my experiences in haiti and work directly with kathy and casey and someone other than dorothy... but Gods plans are more important... <3 <3 <3 and He can make a way later...

so i prayed, processed and realized i needed to say no...and let me tell you that is one of the hardest lessons because it really is beyond my ability to understand why i would pass up a trip to go to the country i LOVE and long to be a part of serving in. however Gods plan is always better than mine...

here are the things i am learning... in saying no...

1. it's ALWAYS better to be in Gods will than my own
2. my identity always needs to be found in HIM, not the things i do
3. my heart for haiti...is Gods heart for haiti
4. every good and righteous desire/passion comes from HIM
5. just because i say no to haiti does not say i am not going back or don't care
6. the people at the market place need to know they are just as important as haiti
7. i am filling in the gaps and giving consistency where there is much unknown in the transition
8. i am capable wherever God puts me
9. He will always make a way...
10. That God is GOOD ALL THE TIME

PRAISE THE LORD in the lessons i have learned in saying no to this trip to haiti......

however this also means i still don't know when i will return to haiti.... but i will wait and trust upon the Lord... because we all know i will return!!!