poutchino how i heart you

so i haven't wrote about the little man in awhile...but i thought i would give a brief update...

i have not seen him in what feels like forever, but really its probably just been a month... he's had it rough lately though...

lots of small seizures and a really big one, that had him in the hospital for awhile...

in fact this one made me more nervous than i can even imagine...it was 40minutes long...no little one should ever have to go through something like this...but yet he continues to be one of the most joyful and resilient kids i know as he smiles and plays several hours after the fact.

when i talked with Klay that evening after they had been in the hospital awhile... Klay said... (I'm paraphrasing) its so hard... you want them to live, but maybe they would be better with their Father in Heaven...not having to struggle to tell how they feel or where it hurts... who knows what the outcome...but God knows and Poutchino is His...that's all we can do is give it to God...

i got off the phone with him and cried....how could i be so gracious... i wanted to be selfish...poutchino couldn't go home to his Father in heaven i wanted him here...i want the option to always see him...to give him hugs...to tell him i love him... i was sure Nancy...his host mama...who i thank God for every time i think of her.... was feeling the same as me....

but nonetheless....he was OK...and survived the longest ever seizure for poutchino on record... even hours after medicines to get it to stop he was still doing the after twitches...

but i believe God has such a BIG plan for this little man full of joy and life...whoever crosses his path is changed...i will be forever changed....

i will never forget running into the building for him...the joy in my anxious heart to see him and there he is playing with his toes surrounded by fear, crying, moaning and more in the aftermath of an earthquake...he will be forever etched in my heart...

and YES its God who decides his story and journey NOT me....and if His will is for a short life...my running into a building to get him will be forever worth it....i love him...and at the same time...have to let the selfishness in me go...and give God the control...and trust that it is Good...for HE IS GOOD...he created poutchi... and the world is better because of it...

all this ramble to say... he is doing better.... here is a short VIDEO that Nancy made of him feeling a bit better...

Keep lifting him up in prayer...and the Brickell's as they take care of him here!